Discussion Series | Rooted | 9. What Do We Do When a Brother or Sister Won't Repent?

Episode Summary:

What do you do when someone in the church is clearly living in unrepentant sin? Today Pastor Steve and Pastor Grant walk us through what Scripture says about confronting a sinning brother or sister, the Matthew 18 process, and how to tell the difference between a believer who is struggling and one who has simply settled.

Key Topics Covered

Why we can't look the other way when a fellow believer is in sin

The Matthew 18 process — step by step

The difference between struggling with sin and being unrepentant

How to confront well — and what restoration looks like

Key Scriptures

Matthew 7:1–5 — judge not, in context

Matthew 18:15–17 — the process Jesus gave us

Galatians 6:1–2 — restore gently, watch yourself

2 Timothy 2:24–25 — patient and gentle instruction

1 John 1:8–9 — confession and forgiveness

2 Corinthians 2:6–8 — restoration after repentance

Key Takeaways

Staying silent about someone's sin is not grace — it’s avoidance.

Matthew 7:1 doesn’t mean never confront sin. It means check yourself first.

The Matthew 18 process has one goal at every stage — restoration.

The difference between struggling and unrepentant is not the presence of sin — it’s the posture of the heart toward it.

You cannot force repentance — but you can create the conditions for it.

The church that disciplines well also restores well.

The Matthew 18 Process

Go privately — Matthew 18:15

Bring one or two witnesses — Matthew 18:16

Bring it to the church — Matthew 18:17

The hard step — treat them as outside the fellowship — Matthew 18:17b

The goal at every stage is restoration.

Reflection Questions

Have you ever stayed silent about someone's sin and called it minding your own business?

What's the difference between judging someone and lovingly confronting them?

Is the person you're thinking about struggling toward repentance — or settled into their sin?

Enjoyed this episode?

Share it with someone who's been trying to figure out how to love a friend through a hard season of unrepentant sin.

Subscribe | Leave a Review | Share with a Friend